101% for Thinking Out of the Box!

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* scene * :
Night. Overcast light from street lamp. SZ stands by the chain-linked fence.
Face hidden in the shadow. Part of his hand – 3 knuckles, to be exact – is visible with a greyish looking cigarette in between his fingers made visible, or rather a plausible conclusion made from the amber glow at the tip and the whitish smoke that streaks the otherwise stale night scene screaming of ahhh … chiaroscuro – a photographer’s dream.
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– – – – – – – – – – – – –
.

Huh? What am I thinking? you asked.
Nothing. Not thinking.
Just visualising. I am ALWAYS visualising. I am visual.
Occasionally graphic. ;p

But nothing quite graphical like what I’m going to share on an occasion of over-sharing (known politely in a politically correct way a ‘public confessions’) by my best-est subordinate thus far in my career during his farewell dinner.
.
hmmmm… how did it start. Forgive me, but I can NOT get the imagery of the punch line off my mind. Very distracting I assure (warn?) you.
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Oh yes! The matter was: about giving credit for quick-original thinking. Or rather smart arse ways to avoid getting caught.
..
– – – – – – – – – – – – –
.
Age 15.
All boys boarding school.
‘smuggled’ pack of Lucky Strike.
Stiff-bored of Bon Jovi’s version of ‘Cats in the Cradle’
and there’s only so much SZ can take from his roomie.
* scene * [repeat]
.
Hostel warden’s whistle goes off in the distant.
S-$%@ !!!
Rushes back to the dorm. Joins the line formation.
Time for a spot-check inspection. Operations code 01C(harlie) A(lpha) 07.
(nomenclature inspired by Adobe Systems practice of naming their programming projects … and sub-projects and sub-sub-projects)
Warden takes a quick whiff of the boys’ hands – identifying those that had a fag recently.
.
SZ is pale. Panicking. Think. Think. Think! Quick & HARD!!!
The punishment he knows is far worse than being put in a 6′ x 6′ wet, cold, dark cell.
.
He smooths his hand over his track pants. Reaches for the garters.
Slides his hand under the comforting fleece material and moves it towards the ‘crack’.
Shoves two fingers up his service hole!
Smiles [despite the flinching pain.]
“… there Mr. Warden, take a DEEP breath,” he thinks.
A satisfied curve forms on his lips, his shoulders relaxes.

101% for quick thinking
101% for originality
101% for a permanent solution

And… I, Penelope, rest my case as to why SZ remains my best-est subordinate ever … Together we rock and rule! All the best dude in your future endeavours.

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