Sluts, Socialites and Sex In The City 2 in KL

.
I know what I’m about to say is totally psycho, but it needs to be said and is totally ok 
(in my books at least)
.
Leland is back!
…. yes! my baby ‘karmapa’ is back.
.
Never felt so connected with my FL2 until this evening. Have not smiled as he roared and conquered the terrains (streets) of Kuala Lumpur for the last 4 months now. Finally. Yes, finally my Leland had taken over the new ‘vessel’.
.
… yes, my car reincarnates  
(in my books at least)
.
… yes, my car has a soul 
(in my books at least)
… yes, it’s called Leland  
(this is for real)
.
… yes, I am giving you the: “are you looking for a fight with me????!?” look
.
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
.
It’s past midnight now. I’m exhausted. I braved peak hour traffic today to get to The Gardens for the Sex In The City 2 Movie Premier. Nope. It’s not showing in cinemas yet. This was some Mercedes Benz marketing blitz, glitzy event for the ladies. Well, they were selling the new E-Class Cabriolet – going at slightly more than past the half a million ringgit mark. That’s cheap seriously… 
oye! wait-lah! Don’t give me that look until you hear me out. It’s comparative… 
It just about gets me my beloved Discovery with some scrumptious to-die-for accessories fitted on. Or the lowest Humvee range available here – the H1.

…yes, I like them big.
Big . Masculine . Conservative . and of course naturally BIG rox my world!

But this evening was about flighty, fluttery bimbos with tight arse, push-up bras, hairsprays responsible for the hole in the ozone layer, 2mm thick caked-up foundation and powder, slutty 12cm high stilettos, metric tonnes of silicone that if leaked will cause a 0.5 metre rise in the oceans’ level, genuine fake Birkins, timepieces with bling2-or-am-i-a-watch identity crisis, and of course enough bling2 power to light up the entire universe.
Short of saying, we were spoiled for choices in terms of potentially fatal ‘weapon’ should a stampede occur.

hmmm… I wonder what the death certificate would say.

Cause of Death: 

oculus sinister rapture by unidentified sharp narrow object

(read as: smashed up left eye/iris by Christian Louboutin’s Star Prive shoe)

or Cause of Death (opt #2):
oblique fracture of the metatarsal by blunt object with traces of aluminium oxide (α-Al2O3)
(read as: broken head resulting from a blow by the (fake) 423 carat Logan Sapphire)

.
Such were the 400-odd women there. Some plus-sized with a voice to match. But on the whole, all had the bitchy-juice that would marinate men the world over at least twice to the perfect level of tenderness and softness that’s pliable around a French manicured (or sex-kitten nail art) finger.
.
… yes, it was evident that a vast majority of the women there hardly made a dime on their own.
Anyone who fits the Career Woman bill would have not even made it there in time, let alone got her hair, make-up, nail etc done for the premiere.
.
Any Career Woman would also know that the price tag on the E-Class Cabriolet is not worth the  pain and hours involved juggling testosterone in board rooms.
.
Most Career Woman would not have gotten an invite anyways, as the Mercedes she drives is company registered.

I obviously have not made it in either circle since I got to the premiere in the nick of time and trust me, I have a financing going for the car, notwithstanding my Bank does not give out company cars – period. And the other thing worth mentioning is: Beemers seems to be the car marque choice for Bankers … so, … yes, it was a lonely, awkward night for Val and me!

.
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

.

Sex In The City 2 in itself is not worth any second deliberating on …  even if you have loads to time to waste. But before I go into that, let me get some confessions out of the bag – I’ve probably only watched 5 to 6 episodes of the TV series and fell asleep at least twice during the first movie. So, yeah, I am not a BIG fan. Heck, I am not a fan.

B..B..But this is Sex In The City 2!           

… gosh. Who the heck funded it?
It’s truly a poor attempt even when cynical me looked at it as a satire to mock anything and everything Middle Eastern by the Western world.
The script was repetitive, blunt, boorish and vulgar. The scenes dragged on with immaculate choreography of every of the girl’s movement and the direction was plain sloppy with erratic tones where even a high school movie project would put Michael Patrick King to shame. 
On a personal level, for someone who has worked and traveled to the Middle East, I found the scenes in Abu Dhabi (Morocco actually) predictable, shallow, ignorant and intellectually insulting. Truth be said, if you have spent the last 10 years of your life in a cave (or a small American town), this movie was made to ‘educate’ you. 
Whilst I tend to refrain myself from criticising women from a physical stand point – yes guys, we have this secret code of conduct (yeah rite! Who am I kidding?!? ha ha) – I can’t help myself here:
Miranda (as appropriately named reminded me of the thirst I had – sitting through 146 minutes – and sudden urge for  the Miranda carbonated orange drink) looked terribly … well, orange.  She truly stands out as a case study of a badly embalmed person for anyone understudying to be a mortician.
Carrie. For @#$ sake Carrie, if you have ‘wings’ and saggy breast, please cover them up! But surprisingly, tramp Samantha looked the best, with the exception of her pale over sized thighs in souk scene. Or maybe I’m more willing to cut Samantha some slack since she’s the oldest and big-gest of all the girls.
.
Having said all of the above, Sex In The City 2 currently tops the UK box office and stands at the 2nd spot after Shrek Forever After in the US, grossing in USD 57,716,811 on Day-7. Well, I guess if the USD 57,716,811 appeared in my bank account… guess what? Sex In The City 2 isn’t all that gross out after all. That’s 350 units of E-Class Cabriolets my dear ladies … yes, that’s how much you are contributing towards a piece of crap in addition to 146 minutes of your life wasted! 

.

.
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

.

.
{does nothing for me. my baby ‘karmapa’ Leland rox! He had nothing to be insecure, but I guess being surrounded by more than one Merc, he sure had to prove his worth to me! lol}
.
.
Advertisements

10 thoughts on “Sluts, Socialites and Sex In The City 2 in KL

  1. a banker who drives a FL damn sophisticated lorrr…..in the same league with those 4 s=c ladies lor…juz dont know whether u fit their MILF tag or not…lol.

  2. John, I did drop out of MEDICAL and LAW school. I am a proud drop-out!!!lolEven my mom has gotten used to uttering "my daughter dropped-out of Law/Medical (where appropriate) school". That's a GREAT achievement.Merc? Shortly before the FL2.The black tiny thing? Haven't had it for ages. It's a police summons magnet. I got 13 speed tickets in 1 year and was detained in Bangsar Police Station! (smirk)wow! Been that long since we caught up eh? How you've been?

  3. Are you sure you dropped out of med school? Funny girl. Thanks though. Did you know that I learn new stuff every time I read your blog. Sapphire lah, shoes lah, grey's anatomy … ha ha ha

  4. babes, I have space in my garage for a Merc if you are giving it away.:)Funny that they still invite you to all these socialite events when you thrash all of them.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s