bad omen . stopping time . when will the jinx break?

Is it a sign? An omen; a bad one?
I am seriously having second thoughts about my “baby” Leland. 
Things have not been good with him around me off late. 
First my auto gate decides to “attack” Leland as I was about to leave for my bank’s family day. Pissed, both with Leland for resisting going to the event {possibly having heard my loud protestations of having to subject myself to such cruelty – being a single-ton} and mom who was entrusted to change the remote control’s batteries with the shop, I held back tears that weighed a tonne as I polished the rear right panel, where the gas tank is to my best ability of removing as much scratches as I can {hardly successful}.
After venting out my anger, frustration and hurt with the uncalled for physical ‘exercise’, I attempted to reverse out of the garage again. 
This time it was the rear right passenger door… and it was bad.
The dent was unmistakable, and let’s just say Leland has a big white vertical stripe … deep scratches that if he was actually human would have required plastic surgery to undo the scar.
Scar-ed myself, in quite a different way … my cheeks were sticky and streaked with mascara by the time I was done trying to fix Leland’s wounds again.

{Why the heck did I apply mascara in the first place? For Pete’s sake we’re headed to a water-amusement-adventure park at the height of 38 degrees Celsius.}

For that fated day onwards, life with Leland had not been the same.
 Just this week I witness two deaths; one occurred right in front of me… 
While I sat in my car staring straight ahead, careful not to ramp into the car ahead of me, I saw the fateful contact that caused the motorcyclist to be lifted off his motorcycle which skidded way ahead of him while he flipped in the air, making an approximate figure “6” before hitting the tarmac, head first followed by read end and finally the limps. The impact cause his possibly loosely latched helmet to dislodge and roll off …
Having had a good 4 months of my past life witnessing one after another such incidences, I knew the outcome. My gut tightened. My tongue felt like lead, though my mouth was wide open in a gasp, which was quickly clamped shut with my mouth as sourish hot liquid made its way from the pits of my stomach to my mouth.
With legs filling like jelly, I vaguely felt the accelerator and depressed it whilst I drop past the limp mass that was on my right, willfully instructing myself not to look, even from the corner of my eyes, but … curiosity got the better of me.

{I wonder what freshener I should get – puking on an empty stomach is rather vial.}

Just this week I had two traffic offenses; one for speaking on my mobile phone without hands free just as I was approaching the Central Bank’s intersection. I was a total wreak and was  unfairly hysterical with a friend whom I stirred from his sleep on the accident above.  Given that an offense is an offense and I was under too much distress, I took the summon in a daze state.
The second time happened right after I had witnessed the second death of the week, which was just the day after the first. This time unconsciously I ‘jumped’ the red lights at the Central Bank’s intersection following and staring ahead at the car in front of me but not really seeing anything. 
I only realised that I had ‘jumped’ the lights some 10 seconds later when I finally figured what the bright flashes from the suspended green box that looked like a mini single hooded traffic light was. Sure, of course I know what a traffic camera is – well, normally, but just not that morning.
5 minutes later I was in a state of panic. 
If history was going to repeat itself, which has been the case in many of my past lives, I had to stop time. Right after the summon for speaking on my O2 {which at that time had not gone missing/stolen}, an airport limousine ramped into Leland’s side as I was waiting for the traffic police to allow us to go pass the Jalan Sultan Ismail-Jalan Ampang intersection. I had been stationary for a good 10 minutes, gear in “P”, handbrake engaged and was reading “Red Herrings.White Elephant” when suddenly …


Mindful of history having the uncanny heck of repeating itself with me, I pulled over into an empty parking lot and waited for 10 minutes before proceeding. It was possibly one of the most deafening 10 minutes in my life. There was an eerie sense of silence where for once I finally understood what it meant to cut the silence with a knife. And yet I can’t get the deafening sound of my thumping heartbeat out of my mind.
One day later, my O2 is missing/stolen.
{to the delight of the many moonlighting iphone sellers in my Bank!}
Today, I hit a parked motorcycle – again looking but not seeing.
{thank God no casualty except for a small polythene panel}
Today, I discovered my zoom H2 is gone!!! 
Together with the audio of the cremation I documented recently.
Tonight I decide I’m stopping time. Life’s going to take a temporary ‘break’. I will not be participating in it; just my unconscious mind.



6 thoughts on “bad omen . stopping time . when will the jinx break?

  1. i feel like going for a run, into the wilderness away from far as my legs take me, this very moment…sigh. or should i do it tmrw since i hv loads 2day?(lol)ktx(siapa lagi?)

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