Work Diary: 3rd Broken Heart, 5 Gaps {and 1 Gap Year?}

He broke my heart.
{This is the 3rd time – the broken heart in a span of week, and not him breaking my heart 3 times!}

The broken heart:
This time, it was the confirmation of his impending departure.

After 5 years, I had found him painful to deal with; he hardly seems to hear and appears to have bad time management.

“He irritates everyone”, if one were to go solely by his reputation in the market.
But it is quickly followed by: “but everyone loves him!”
He’s like one of those things that just gets under your skin and refuses to let up, I suppose.
Nonetheless, I’ve always adored him.
Maybe coz he has a soft sport for me and gives me the time of the day.
Maybe it’s coz he hears me out … when it’s important, and takes the extra effort to assist and pave the way for me.
Maybe its coz he respects me as a person and gives me credit when it’s due.
Maybe it’s coz he values my opinion, laughs at my jokes and shares experiences on many fronts with me.

What I know with certainty is this:

i am inspired by him
. energetic . fresh ideas . strong influential skills . innate ability to individualised .

The only senior management I had seen taking the pains to carefully select words and craft motivational statements in his people’s performance appraisal; even if its an unsatisfactory performance. 
He’s one with a heart of gold.
One who would stick his neck out when its right.
One who can be counted as a friend and supporter.
Trying not to show any emotions at the news and resisting calling him, I spent the rest of the day at work with labored anticipation, jittery nerves and delicate water ducts that threatens to swell up from time to time.
Unable to concentrate, I decided to reopen the draft copy of my resume and complete it. 
Holding back from sending it out to consultancy firms for the longest of time, I found myself drafting an email to the ex-Malaysian practice Managing Director of one of the world’s leading global professional services company that assist organizations improve performance through effective people, risk and financial management. After all, it’s the largest and oldest in its field. Staffed with enough actuaries, mathematicians, economist – like myself, my type of people. 
Beyond that, I know very little about them.
At 6:15 p.m. I took my jacquard Prada out for a walk heading towards the car park.
By 7:00 p.m. I had parked my car, took a photo of the parked car (acknowledging my lack of concentration at that juncture to be reliable for a recall later), bought 5 pairs of Gap pants, had the hem measurements done, collected my alteration collection slip, paid for the parking and walked towards my car. I was feeling a lot calmer by then; though still in a daze. I’ve never bought Gap pants. I only own 2 other Gap clothes in my life … till now.


{big long pause and sigh}
Galle and Male will be the new India in my life.
Whoops! Got to start liking those chicken of the sea” 
{read HERE for my opinion on them – the “chicken of the sea”}
… or perhaps embark on a Gap Year myself, given that I can’t decide on the various propositions received.

The only thing I have decided is my very own ‘expiration’ / ‘deadline’ here… and thanks to he who broke my heart the 3rd time; I was woken from my stupor and took charge of my life.

For that, I am ever thankful and can’t help but remember and recount all the reasons I adore him.
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
Like a vast majority of my posts, the occurrences are real {exaggerated to an extend as my imagination and inner voice/thought would allow} and are often posted as an after-event, days, weeks, months and sometimes years later. 

Travel postings in particular and my whereabouts are deliberately delayed or sequences jumbled for security reasons.

For this particular post, I had to edit and re-edit many times over to coincide the publishing time with the formal announcement being made at the Bank. Posting with regards to the Bank are often heavily crypted for privacy and confidentiality purposes.

7 thoughts on “Work Diary: 3rd Broken Heart, 5 Gaps {and 1 Gap Year?}

  1. Oh dear let me clarify that it's Time Clock that prompted me to explore and had been doing so for the past 1 year with ex-boss in the loop. His departure got me to up the game … the decision, readiness and timeliness was all there. There's no PUSH factor either. If anything I am feeling a lot of reluctance, sadness and the occasional pang of regret for leaving.Since everyone went Anon (understandably) – I suppose I'll know over who's who over the lunches/tea …Just one thing to say though – don't react over the "new" guy. Look, a known devil is anytime better than an unknown one. And do give the "new" guy a shot. A chance. Before prosecuting him.

  2. Didn't know you were that close to him.I mean you are close to all the Mancom but never thought my boss resigning would have affected you so much.Like whoever up there, I am dreading the prospect of the acting person. Sigh.Must update my resume as well.Can't stay here any more.No direction.No strong leadership.No capable manager also!All the best girl.Keep in touch.

  3. It's very sad to see the core members all leaving.All the best to all of you.I'll call for lunch.Thanks for this write up.Didn't realize how much we impact one another until I read your honest spill. Makes me want to cry also.

  4. @Anon #1hmmm… I stand by I ADORE HIM regardless of whether I reported to him or not.@Anon #2yes, I too was expecting first quarter for the replacement … I reserve my comments.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s