Work Diary: Notice Period is Overrated

24 hours and out you go is something common in the financial industry; fear of the competitor. But seriously … don’t you think that any intended grand theft would have been committed way before the piece of carefully typed out paper that had gone through edits after edits of censorships from saying “{blip blip blip} boss and {blip blip} company I hereby gleefully thank the Heavenly Gods for having being blessed to be rid of you?” being handed over to the boss with a well practiced and composed facial expression???
On a personal basis I would have like that. the 24 hours that is.
I hate serving notice.
I am certain this holds true for a vast majority of people.
Though I am not the irresponsible type and one who would ensure proper hand-over takes place – though again I question why since the {blip blip blip} boss and {blip blip} company and definitely the {blip blip blip} political two headed ‘snake’ colleagues and the new over eager, can’t admit I f@#$-up incumbent will say otherwise.
My problem is not the so much the need to work for the remaining of my tenure.
My problem is I dread having to drag myself in and facing people; making polite small talks and false promises of ‘I will be your friend for eternity‘ – yeah rite, when mostly you and I frankly would rather the other drop dead at one snap of the finger command.

I also can’t stand farewells.
If the above holds true and void of an emperor food tester, what assurance I have that it’s safe to share a meal???
Jokes aside, I don’t have that many foes who would poison me, there is bound to be a busybody two who will probe incessantly on areas or details you’d rather not share in public and more importantly share with them … rendering the exhausting need to make belief and create a fable or two on my part.
And mostly I find it too troublesome to restrain self from slapping either the over eager or insecure boss that hovers at the door way and dishing out hypocrisy after hypocrisy, ignorant of the fact that the Heavenly Gods had in fact created the hole in our face for a very different and noble reason.  
Naturally, the {blip blip blip} boss is incapable of comprehending the above as hypocrisy had somehow embedded itself into his or her gene pool and DNA make somewhere between post undergraduate studies and mid-level management.

Nonetheless, utopia would have been garden leave for me.
Whoever invented this concept {as silly as the name may be} deserves a nobel prize. And given the budget cuts in the nobel prize prize (money), I am certain there’s enough of us out there who are more than happy to dig into our coffers to make a contribution to top the budget.

Well, put it this way:
I am not a very driven person when it comes to the act of going to work
The idea of it repels me.
I am mostly not lazy … well, most of the time at least.
It just takes a lot to get pass the inertia of my resistance towards taking the first purposeful and physical step towards the journey of going to work. 
See, I simply don’t want to get out of bed.

I don’t want or can’t sleep before 2 a.m. is the root cause problem.
NO.
Make the desire to drink coffee and actually doing it at 10 p.m. the root cause problem.
Whatever the case is, I am not inspired to dress-up and it doesn’t improve with the need to eat and drive.
But once at it – at work that is – I am absorbed. 
Or rather to be deadpan honest, 80% of the time I am mostly floating around uninspired; nursing a bad headache like an alcoholic would nurse a hang-over for the first 2 to 3 hours in the morning followed by being just too dazed to start anything inspiring.
I don’t get inspired often.
I’ve not figured out why, so I’d rather not speculate for now.
Point is, being uninspired most of the time, I am henceforth a mechanical breathing organism functioning on a semi-comatosed state for most of my working hours. 
Usually, the sparks does eventually happen as the deadline looms frighteningly close.

Two of my ex-bosses have come to learn to cope with it and remain calm; externally at least, with the reassurance drawn from previous experiences that something “wow” {good or bad “wow”? it’s up for interpretation} will emerge just before the boardroom meeting room’s heavy doors swing open and we stride in purposefully to state our case. To attain approval.
I wonder if I would ever change. 
Or should I even change?
Frankly, between you and me, there are occasions and moments where I get scared too.
As to how incredible unperturbed I am of the deadlines.
Of the importance of the task.
Of the urgency of the work.
Of the risk I take with unnecessary procrastination. 
This much I know: it’s nothing to do with the ‘lizard brain’ Seth Godin talks about. 
And frankly, at times, nothing great – NO, make that plain vanilla not-a-thing – emerges, but the confident stride down the hallway must take place.
Where the spill must happen.
Where the nod is needed.
Where the signature of endorsement is demanded.

It’s amazing how I pull it through – there’s no way I can tell you as it’s done mostly in a half capacity of an active brain that is distracted by the need to wake the other half up.

So, even if it’s a 3 months notice period, or 1 month, or a week, chances are I’d only start filling, organising and typing the handover stuff 2 hours to the end of my time there.
Brain awake or otherwise … the typing happens.
The handover meeting takes place.
Handshakes are done and I’m outta there! 
Adios!
Just so you know, this time around, I spent 10 minutes for each of my immediate direct reports roles, KPIs, outstanding items and other “important” handover notes.
Yes, just 10 minutes…
Though, I’m not sure there’s a real need for more – is there? 
The organisation is in a sorry Employee Value Proposition state for their proudly proclaimed existence of 140 years … it ain’t gonna make a difference I reasoned.
My boss have been there for 1-1/2 years and has done nothing … which, by the way I swear to the Heavenly Gods and on my Queen-ly Grandmother’s life those words were his very own admission to me when the Managing Director asked for a write-up on achievements on the people front for the Annual Report. So seriously, it ain’t gonna make a difference. 
At least I spent 10 minutes x 3. 
At least in my 6 months of being there, I had implemented many key things to the point of being summoned by the MD and asked to slow-down as the changes, whilst great, are too fast for the organisation.
Now, that’s my shocking first.
I’ve never been asked to do less in any of my jobs before … never.
.
..
Advertisements

7 thoughts on “Work Diary: Notice Period is Overrated

  1. @andy882 previous lives ago the resignation letter thanked everyone but the immediate boss – he didn't deserved to be thanked and is too dumb to read between the lines and get the nuances anyways.The last resignation letter … I dedicated a whole paragraph as to how it was an honour to serve such a great man … I felt like an American sent to Iraq or Afghanistan!;pSamples available at a low fee of USD 0.99, free shipping on etsy! lolz

  2. Totally with anon there"Can't remember a single job that I left and it wasn't attributed to the shit boss."So, what did you write in your resignation letter? We probably could use a great template!;p

  3. I hate my boss all the time and tell him on his face.My wife wonders why I take so long in the bathroom – well, I'm having a tough conversation with the boss!;o heh hehe

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s