50 grams water + 50 grams flour -> parenting reversal!

At some point in time, our lives take a 180 degrees turn.
Children starts parenting parents being one of such example most of us go through.
Today (weeks ago by the time this blog gets published), Val emailed me to enquire if mom’s mood and outlook of her new kitchen cabinet had improved. And we are talking merely of a 7 feet wall space where she’d decided she wanted a sort of revolving type pantry and a slot to ‘house’ the new pyrolytic oven … which somehow the carpenter screwed up with the accurate dimensions and fittings.

This drama is really only the tip of the iceberg where it doesn’t cover the back chicken coop styled external (but enclosed) kitchen which has been fitted with new country styled tiles, a hood and hob and carpentry work thanks to the kitchen refurbishment domino effect.
This drama does not include the mud room between the chicken coop styled external (but enclosed) kitchen and the side garden patch that houses the compost bin, two urns of guppies and our late honourable “Lord” Rover‘s detached home.
This drama does not include the tea room that was refurbished to accommodate more display cabinets and the two refrigerators that had to be relocated from the initial 7 feet stretch of wall.

And now I’m hearing that there’s an urgent need to visit Sunder Nagar Market to buy more porcelain knobs, which I am conveniently ignoring. In defense, these knobs at Sunder Nagar Market are the real deal sold at a song … unlike those which I spotted on Anthropologie‘s website some years back {read: HERE}

If you must really know, the root cause of the kitchen cabinet “problem” lies with 50 grams of wheat flour and 50 grams of water

Yes, that’s it. The 3 sourdough starter my mom has been cultivating on it’s exclusive shelf in the fridge with the following labels on the exterior: “dough doug“, “petal” and “bud

Ashamed to say this, but mom greets all three a happy morning daily, but fails to do the same with me.
I suppose, if she were to start, I’d get all suspicious and probably spit out these words only to regret: what do you want to buy now???

Even if the lack of caffeine in my blood stream should be the culprit to take most of the blame for that uncalled for rudeness, it’s seriously not a very nice thing to say.

Anyways, back to “dough doug“, “petal” and “bud story …
In order to bake good sourdough bread (artisan bread), one needs a hearth oven. The extreme heat accompanied by a water pan or spritz of droplets of water is meant to shock the “yeast” and give the bread an oven spring. Long story short, (until and unless you are seriously interested in the science of bread making, email me separately), let’s get to the point of my rant.

With friends on the sourdough forum; one of which that has to reside in nearby Puchong who has an engineer husband that built her a hearth oven … naturally the “dough doug“, “petal” and “bud“updates were constant, which eventually led to mom wishing her 20-year old good ol’ faithful Electrolux oven would “die”on a daily basis … it (the 20-year old good ol’ faithful Electrolux oven) of course never did “die” and still sits in the chicken coop styled external (but enclosed) kitchen. Thank God for the hobs, it’s was never thrown out and admittedly after all it’s good year of service, I have to say I have a strange fondness for its gawd-awful olive green coloured enamel paint work.

Now, the challenge is this.
In order to get extreme heat of at least 250 degrees Celsius, one needs a pyrolytic oven than reaches 500 degrees Celsius.

First, even if your current non-pyrolytic oven shows a thermostat of 250 degrees Celsius, the truth is it only manages a 230 degrees Celsius with some difficulty.

Secondly, although a pyrolytic oven reaches to 500 degrees Celsius, it only does so in the auto-lock pyrolytic condition for safety reasons with your actual cooking/ baking thermostat only showing between 250 to 280 degrees Celsius.

Furthermore, a pyrolytic oven is only able to transform food debris into ash, but that’s seriously as good as self cleaning goes since frankly it’s the drips, splish-splosh-splash and tiny food particles lodged at odd angles and crevices is really what you’re really after in terms of cleaning the oven. {watch HERE}
So, I’m truly sorry – there is no chance you’d be able to go on a budget by incinerating your cat in a pyrolytic oven without the services of a professional pet crematorium!

In addition, all pyrolytic ovens in the market – besides being ridiculously pricey – comes only built-in … rendering the need to bloody refurbished the entire kitchen cabinets!

Also, forget modular furniture in future! Regardless of how modular your kitchen cabinet was designed to be, adding or omitting bits years later does not work for two reasons:
ONE wood is still alive even if it’s long transformed from a tree – being organic in nature, it “grows” or “shrinks” and like all of us, is imperfect in its aging, rendering it difficult to flush any additions in.
TWO the colour/ shade will never be the same and the hassle of sanding the doors down and repainting them – provided your cupboards are made of natural solid wood, you might as well just change everything.

Lastly, get acquainted with the: “kitchen refurbishment domino effect”
Unless you are prepared to settle for either mis-matched interior designs or ability to grit your teeth and insist on an outdated design style with your interior designer, contractor and cabinet maker … the kitchen refurbishment domino effect will occur. And if you have the ill luck (like me) of having a tea room, a mud room, an external (enclosed) kitchen and an open concept bathroom and laundry room that links on one floor in a fluid manner, please get acquainted to the “kitchen refurbishment domino effect” that will drain your bank account very quickly.

Photograph of mom’s sourdough with fruits bread | Penelope Haque | All Rights Reserved


In any case, like parents who work excessive hours and have little time for their children, this is my penance for the last 2 months of 80-90 hours work week that will continue for another 1-1/2 months at least before I am gone with almost no communication access for a month, followed by another 3 months of merger and acquisition integration work upon my return!
Like I said, this is the time of role reversal; me the ‘irresponsible far from adequate parent’, mom the ‘abandoned child’.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s